Humanitarian Margaret Kistow and her right hand man, Rossman Mendoza. Photos: Angelo Marcelle
By MARSHA MOKOOL
Many pity the orphaned children in our society because of the perception that a child, any child, is better off with his biological parents.
But if you ask any of the children at Margaret Kistow Children’s Home where home is, they will tell you they are already home at 54 Ackbarali Street, Malabar.
There is a heartbreaking story involving three brothers at the home, Daniel, eight, Bruce, nine and Christopher, 13, who have been living at the home for seven years.
The brothers, who were abandoned by their parents, were discovered living in a cardboard box in a Penal shack without food and water.
Two years ago, the children’s mother, a recovering drug addict, appeared from nowhere and took her eldest son back to Penal to live with her and her new husband, a daily paid worker.
The couple, who recently had a baby of their own, are planning to take the other two boys as well. But according to Margaret Kistow, founder and manager of the Margaret Kistow home, the children are better off at the shelter.
“These people have no electricity or pipe borne water. The eldest son (Christopher) has to tote water a mile away from his wooden shack.
“Right now he is begging to come back here because he is very unhappy and his life is very hard,” said Kistow.
Even as she spoke, Daniel, the youngest of the brothers, was seen playing merrily with the other children, while Bruce sat quietly and watched cable with the older children, inside the average sized, flat concrete house.
“I personally believe they are better off living here. Remember they are boys and if they go out there, people can use them for drugs and make them do all sorts of things for money,” said Kistow.
“Many of the children who have left the home are actually begging to come back because they are not getting food. Some of them don’t go to school because their parents can’t afford to give them travelling money,” she added.
The Children of Margaret Kistow
The Margaret Kistow Children’s Home, which has been in operation for 19 years, accommodates 28 children between the ages of two and 18.
Kistow, 60, the daughter of former Arima Mayor Norman Kistow, has lived at the same residence for 45 years.
She started off running a day care for working parents and single mothers. The first child was just nine-months-old when she came to live at the home.
Since then, Kistow, who has no biological children of her own, has been a surrogate mother to more than 100 children which have passed through the shelter.
Her humanitarian services have earned her numerous awards and tributes by the Arima Borough Council and several other orgaanisations throughout the country.
Kistow, a devout Roman Catholic, also makes it a point that the children go to church every weekend. The children, who affectionately refer to her as “Aunty,” do not consider themselves orphans,” said Kistow.
“The children grow up like brothers and sisters. Some of them came here when they were just babies and they don’t know any other home.
“Some were brought by parents, grandparents, social workers or by the police. Some of them have been abused physically and sexually by their parents, who are drug addicts.
“But some of them are also here because their parents are too poor to take care of them,” she said.
Many of the children don’t even know their parents, according to Kistow.
“If three parents visit in a year, we consider ourselves lucky,” she said.
All Female Staff Policy
Rossman Mendoza, 25, who came to the orphanage 17 years ago, is the head chef and second in command at the home.
But he is not considered a member of staff.
“He is more like a role model to the children, particularly the boys. He is my right hand man and like a son to me,” said Kistow.
The childcare attendants, the cook and the housekeeper, are all women.
There are currently 16 girls at the home and many of them are teenagers.
“We don’t encourage men on staff because we have lots of girls. The men come from all sorts of backgrounds and we have to be careful,” said Kistow.
“If we hire men, the girls may become attracted to them and the men may want to caress them. These children have already been abused, so we don’t want to hurt them anymore,” she added.
Schooling
The children go to school from Mt Hope to Sangre Grande. They are given travelling money to go to school every week.
“When they return to the home, they must do their homework before they watch television or play.
“They are good kids. They come straight home after school and they don’t get in any trouble.
“But the teachers give them a hard time because they live at a shelter. They get accused of all the wrong things.
“But what makes them different, I don’t know,” she exclaimed.
Annadel, 15, who was only one month when she came to the home, is no different from the regular kids in her school.
She plays netball, field and track. She is in the drama club, sings with her school choir and also beats pan.
“We have always encouraged the children to pursue their goals. I know that whatever Annadel puts her mind too, she will excel at it,” said Kistow.
Learning to Love
Rossman Mendoza, 25, a qualified chef, is currently pursuing his degree in business administration and modern accounts. He came to the home with his three siblings when he was just seven.
His siblings, 18, 19 and 22, still live at Margaret Kistow’s.
Rossman, who bears physical and emotional scars, got very emotional as he spoke about the physical abuse he endured at the hands of his father. At the age of two, he was in a coma and spent eleven months in the hospital recovering from a fractured skull.
“Being here saved my life and made me accomplish everything I have achieved. I would have been a vagrant or bandit or I might have been dead if I was still with my parents,” said Rossman.
“I came from a life of violence. All I knew when I came here was hate and anger. But Aunty (Margaret Kistow) always teaches us to forgive.
“People say love is a gift you are born with. But I had to learn about love from scratch. This is where I learnt about love and brotherhood,” he said.
Lack of Funding
Last December, 12 of the children were forced to leave the shelter because the Ministry of Health said the facilities were too small to house the 36 children living there at the time. Kistow has tried her best to upgrade the facilities over the last year, despite the lack of adequate funds. But there is still a lot that needs to be done.
The home, which exists on the goodwill of caring citizens, has six bedrooms, four baths and eight toilets.
The dilapidating ceiling in the children’s bedrooms, the broken toilet and the broken toilet seat are just some of the things that need urgent attention.
In the kitchen, only two of the burners work and there is no microwave to re-heat food. The children also need bed sheets and curtains.
These days there is no chicken in the fridge because funds are low. But there is turkey in the deep freeze which they are saving for Christmas.
TO ASSIST MARGARET KISTOW, PLEASE CALL 769-9163 OR 717-6886.
